"She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands." Proverbs 31:13
I'm not even sure how to begin this morning with my posting here. It's really been a remarkable weekend, and when I keep thinking on it, I'm totally overwhelmed. Truly overwhelmed, because God spoke to me this weekend, and I'm still processing how incredible this was. And the thing is, when Thursday evening arrived- the first night of this weekend's conference, I was totally chastising myself. I was feeling like I'd not appropriately prepared myself for the weekend. In the days leading up, I would think about really sitting down with my Bible, even fasting in preparation, and I did nothing. I did the barest Bible reading last week- I think I only progressed through about four chapters in six days. So I kind of scolded myself, but then I decided that I was not going to dwell on that at all, and I was really going to dig in and experience this weekend. I was not going to let the distractions going on in normal everyday life get to me this weekend while we were spending time with God.
It was a great weekend. And I think I'll be spending a bit of this week sharing bits and pieces. Because it's way too much to share at once. My brain cannot process it all at once. But one thing that came to mind to me this morning, just now was how my attitude was this weekend. I just wanted to make the most of it. The last conference we had was in the middle of a busy recital weekend, so while I was able to participate, I had to keep my mind on the clock and on my kids, and I just wasn't able to really just focus on what was going on in front of me. So this weekend, I purposed to focus. And it was delightful.
God reminded me of something this weekend in a very big way. Two years ago, I came up with this crazy idea to bake and pray. At the time I was excited about it, but the more I thought on the idea of baking and praying for people while I baked just started to sound silly. Add to that that since then, the checkbook has been a little snug, so buying extra ingredients for baking sprees hasn't been much in the cards. I've thought on that a lot since then, and every once in a while I'll have a thought to bake something for someone- and then I dismiss it. Well. Apparently I need to stop dismissing, because God used an international speaker, television producer and author to tell me from the pulpit that I needed to get back to this baking. Seriously.
It was an extremely cool moment for me, because what she was telling me about baking was not new news to me. She was saying how my baking will bless people- and I knew that. But this was, in fact, complete 100% confirmation to me that this idea I had had two years ago, was not a nutball idea. It was a God idea, and I need to take action on it. Of course the practical part of my flesh kicked right in as soon as she was done speaking to me, and I thought, baking is all well and good, but it costs money to buy ingredients. Literally, within seconds of sitting back down, these were the very thoughts that went through my head. It's incredible to me how quickly the devil will try to steal something from a person. Within seconds, I went from this awesome feeling to second-guessing it.
"The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." John 10:10
Well, I saw what was going on, and I started praying about baking. I had a nice little talk with God about it, and I thanked Him for sharing with me in that way, and then I told Him that I was going to be expecting the ability to do this baking. By that, I meant that the ingredients would be there- the finances would be there to buy them, and the time would be there to do the baking itself. And I assured God that I was not going to let the devil steal this away from me a second time. I was going to cling to it and remind myself about it, and I was going to get into gear to do this baking. I'm going to be spending time in the next few weeks going through my favorite baking cookbooks and making notes- notes about which people come to mind when I see a specific recipe. Seriously, in the last few weeks I've had such an itch to work on some cookie baking. I have thoughts and ideas and I've wanted to work on a few new recipes, but lack of funds for such an endeavor has kept me from doing so.
I am a very firm believer that if God plants a seed of an idea inside of us, that He wants us to bring to fruition, that He will make a way for that idea to blossom. I just know that I know that I know that God wants me to do this baking- AND HE will make a way for that baking to be done in all areas of my life. He will make a way with the extra time to do the baking, and He will provide the necessary ingredients and tools as well. And most importantly, He will keep this desire alive inside of me, and show me, through the Holy Spirit, when I am supposed to activate this baking ministry. He will show me who needs the blessing of baking, and He will make that possible.
And I think with that, I may go see if I can find something to bake today. Tomorrow I will share something else that God spoke to me about this weekend. Something that, well, I truly did not expect.