Monday, May 16, 2011

Digging Back In

"Your word I have hidden in my heart,
         That I might not sin against You."  Psalm 119:11

I've taken far too many breaks here as of late.  Oh, I have perfectly valid reasons each and every time, and this last one was really so that I could take the time to focus on what we needed to get done with our last few weeks of school this year.  But other than the times where I take a break because I'm sick or on vacation, the fact of the matter is that usually when a little break comes up, it's because I'm not in the right frame of mind.  And that was the case this time, and I wanted to share that and be honest, because it does happen to everybody.  The reason I have not been in the right frame of mind?  I set my map aside.

It's been a busy number of weeks- quite busy in fact, and as day after day passed by, and I kept myself moving from task to task, there was one very important thing that always seemed to be the first thing to slip away- and that is reading from my Bible.  I know everyone knows how that goes- you have just a minute or two to sit and grab a bite to eat, and you think, hey, maybe I'll get a bit of Bible reading in, but then you also think that you really only have a minute or two, so you might as well just flip through the paper, and then you can take the time later to give the Bible a little better chunk of time.  And then the chunk of time never arrives.  This goes on day after day, and before you know it, the only time you're opening your Bible is at a church service.  And that's exactly how the last several weeks have been.  I was aware of it too- it wasn't like I was forgetting that I wasn't reading my Bible, I knew it- and I was feeling guilty. So then, I was almost avoiding it, because I didn't want to open up my Bible and be scolded. Sigh.

And then I had a dream last week, and upon waking, I knew exactly what it meant.   In my dream, my family was in the car, and we were going on a vacation.  I have no idea where, but we were all excited to get to our destination, only we were having problems with the map we had. It wasn't correct- the roads printed on the map were not the roads we were driving on, and the whole thing was pretty much useless.  If only we had the correct map, we could get to our awesome vacation destination with our family.

Day after day, I was setting my "map" aside.  The best guidebook we have in life is our Bible, and I was setting it aside for other activities.  Activities that will not benefit my family as great as that time in The Word will.  When I think about that dream and think about how there was a vacation- a fun and great time- at the other end of the trip, it really makes me feel bad that I've let my Bible reading slide.  Because honestly, I've felt like our family has really been on the cusp of something, like there's something new and exciting coming up for us, but maybe I've delayed that something new because I didn't have the correct map open.

Admittedly, after probably several months where I didn't have any real significant dreams going on, in the last week, they've been almost rapid fire, and most of them I have no idea what they mean.  I think that's also because my Bible time has slipped, because with the Bible time slipping, any quiet time slips as well.  The quiet time I take at the end of the day doesn't happen either because I'm embarrassed that I haven't done my reading... it's a vicious cycle, and I'm happy to say that I am sharing all this today because today is the day that it is over.   I can't grow in God if I'm not following HIS directions for my life.  I can't help my children to grow in God if I'm not spending that time in my Bible finding out exactly how it is I'm to raise them.  With God's help, I can do anything, but I need to be spending time reading His directions in order to find the help I need.

So it's a new day, with new promise, and I thought at the end today, I would share where my Bible reading has already taken me today.  Wisdom is a great thing.

"My son, if you receive my words,
      And treasure my commands within you,
       2 So that you incline your ear to wisdom,
And apply your heart to understanding;
       3 Yes, if you cry out for discernment,
And lift up your voice for understanding,
       4 If you seek her as silver,
      And search for her as
for hidden treasures;
       5 Then you will understand the fear of the LORD,
      And find the knowledge of God."  Proverbs 2:1-5

Happy Monday everyone!

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