"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
This was the lesson I got to work on yesterday. You know how sometimes something comes along that you can't help it- you just worry about it. A lot. And you really dwell on it, and it almost makes you ill, you just keep thinking about that problem or that issue, and try to come up with possible solutions. Sure, you pray about it, but then you think about it some more- it practically consumes you, you are thinking about it so much.
I had to recite this verse to myself several times over last night, because I was there. I was thinking about something that came about yesterday and I was trying really hard to not be upset, because this time, it had a twist. It was something that directly affects my kids, and that made my thought processes even worse, as I tried to come up with a solution in my own mind that was not going to cause hurt to my children. I'll tell you, there is very little that is worse than being a mom, cherishing your children, and knowing that you are going to have to tell them something that will make them upset and sad. Thankfully, I can at least postpone telling them until I have to, and that gives me time to talk to God about it more.
Because you know what? There is nothing that goes on in my life, and in the life of my children that God doesn't know about. And HE knows what is best in every situation. I spent some time talking to God last night, and really, what I was talking to Him most about, was that I was questioning Him, because the whole situation is just strange to me, and I just wanted understanding. I didn't get understanding, but you know what I definitely got, I got peace. Because God is in control. He knows, and He holds my children's hearts in His hands, and that I have to trust in most of all. The absolute last thing a mom wants to see is her child's heart break. I'll tell you, when we moved a few weeks ago, we were so excited-all of us- that there wasn't any bit of sadness about leaving where we were until one particular moment. When my kids went next door to say goodbye to their best friend, and then walked out and straight to the van, my mommy heart just broke for them. My kids are old enough that they will remember this friend for forever- I know I still remember my best friend when I was six years old. I prayed to God as I walked to that van myself that He would make this transition easy for my kids, and so far, He seems to be coming through, as they LOVE our new house.
So I remembered that last night, and I remembered these verses above, and I basically had two choices. One, I could lay awake all night, rolling things around in my mind, coming up with solution after solution that really wouldn't do anything except sit in my mind anyway. Or, I could just give the entire thing to God. If it comes to pass, I need to believe that God has a reason for it. But I have to really and truly give the issue to Him. I can't just think on it all the time- because all that will do is rob me of my daily joy, and it will also rob me of sleep- which these days I feel like I already don't get enough. There's nothing the devil would like more than to see me lose my cool and become short with my family, and he would love to see anger and division in our household.
Fortunately for us, we are a Godly household. The very day we moved in, our home was blessed, and it will remain blessed, and no enemy can tread here. So as situations come along, like the one that sprang up yesterday, I need to remember and I need to trust. My mommy heart needs to trust that if this needs to happen, that God will protect my children's hearts and not allow hurt to enter and fester. He will prepare them accordingly for the challenge, and He will cradle them in the palms of His hands. Because as much as I love them- God loves them even more. That boggles my mind daily, because I love them so much that I feel as though most days my heart will explode. But God loves them so much, that He can't wait to spend eternity to with them.
As I've given Him my children to protect and watch over, I trust that He knows what is best and will take care of them in the times to come. I will not worry, and I will not be anxious, because that serves no purpose other than to drive me batty and make me unpleasant. Instead, I take the whole issue, fold it up and tuck it in a box, and hand the box right over to God. He can have it, and He can take care of it as necessary. If the box needs to be dealt with, He'll prepare the little hearts that need caring for. If the box just happens to vanish, that will be His answer as well. God's got everything under control, and I will trust in Him with all my heart.
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding" Proverbs 3:5
Postscript: I don't usually do this, and I save the praise reports for a completely seperate post, but since this issue was on my mind this morning, I thought the praise should go right here. After thinking on it a while, I was promptly distracted by school. But once school was over, I was STILL dwelling on the problem, and I was wondering if I should actually pull Abigail aside and talk to her about it and get her thoughts. I decided not to yet, but just a short while later, I was in the shower when God dropped a very clear and awesome solution into my mind. It literally came from nowhere, and I know it was God-inspired. The answer is, of course, perfect, and takes care of any hurt that could be perceived on either end of this issue. Thank God for His timely answers in our times of need.